Tuesday, March 10, 2009


For my newly married friends

By Sirohmi Gunesekera

Wish me luck as I wave you goodbye, Here we go on our way…"

The confetti was thrown on the happy couple as they held hands and walked out into the sunshine.

Marriage is a milestone in life and most couples marry expecting to live happily ever after. This is because most people have grown up with the fairy tale unconsciously colouring their lives.

But be careful. Living with another person, especially one of the opposite sex, can be very difficult. He has been brought up one way and you another. Maybe he is used to throwing his shirt and towel just about anywhere while you are neat and tidy to a fault. You may end up crying because your feelings are easily hurt.

At the beginning, expectations are high and there is the intimacy of sex one feel oh so special.

Most Sri Lankan couples have not lived with others before they marry. Never mind the past. Try not to carry hangovers from the past into the present.

But apart from sex, living together and sharing are a whole different ballgame.

"Start as you mean to go on" And share household chores. If you are lucky, find a place of your own where both of you can start life together.

Money is a major problem and it is good to have a proper attitude towards it. Money is required and it is good to have a healthy respect for it but always always remember that the best things in life are free. For instance, if anything happens to your loved one, do you think that any amount of money can compensate? But it is important to try and save money for a rainy day.

If both of you enjoy each other’s company, you don’t have to spend a lot of money on dining in fancy restaurants or going shopping. Today, the world is geared to getting people to spend money to make up for the lack of love in their lives. So if you have love, the sky’s the limit as you enjoy Nature and each other.

Cooking noodles together can help build a memory and is better than buying a packet of rice. DO NOT divide work into Men’s Work and Women’s Work. Share whatever you can and you will find that even taking out the trash can be the occasion for a tender word and a hug afterwards.

Don’t be in a hurry to have a baby because that means responsibilities. If the two of you share a room, now is the time to lock up your room and go on a day trip to Kandy with your camera. Build memories of loving looks and warm hugs as the two of you trek into the hills.

Wake up early and hug each other in the dawn, giving thanks for a brand new day. If both are working, prepare yourself for a day apart and still try to give at least a call during the day.

Evening comes and you sit out in the moonlight and hold hands while counting the stars as they twinkle into being in the night sky. Relax, you can have a late dinner.

Being Newly Married is a very special time of life and enjoy every moment of it for it won’t come again.